Addiction

i want to go home.
i mean MY home.

once again, i've fallen into her 'trap'. was i the one whom wanted this?

perhaps i am not made for her to be liked.

sometimes the simplest thing is hardest to understand.

abg pu and i talked for hours the night after the ceremony. we've not had long chats since ages. we came to the conclusion that i have been, i am and i will always be seento her as her 'challenger'. no one can talk to her, none can make her change but only circumstances. major ones. perhaps he's right. and i wonder what the circumstance will be.

i thought i could make you happy. i thought i could make you proud. but my achievements seem to spark anger in you. so i run again. and as the pattern continues, i couldn't find a way to stop.

you're right baby, it is an addiction.

"do you want me to break this off..? tell me what you want. you had wanted me to do this. and so i did. you know you are influential. you can memperkecilkan orang and you can also membesarkan orang. so now tell me what you want so i can feed your ego and satisfy your power. because right now i can see a failure in my life with words you put into my head."